The Hamster Life...Are you living it?

Excerpt from Discovering the Power in We

by Linda McPharlin

People who hit rock bottom, have a dramatic breakdown, or who lose everything in one fell swoop are very lucky.  When this happens to someone, they know it is time to start over.  There is no mistaking this message from the universe, and it cannot be ignored.  They learn in a solid and clear way that what they are doing is not working.  They are driven from their mistaken path without choice and forced to change.  Also, they are deeply humbled rendering them more easily capable of knowing gratitude and appreciation.  I realized that what I was going through was much more dangerous and insipid than if I had been lucky enough to have a tragic rock-bottom moment in my life. 

I had been spending my life wasting away in mediocrity, comfort, and deception.  I was existing.  I was content.  It was a good life.  The days were flowing one into another in a clock-work routine of constant busyness.  I was juggling all of the balls, keeping all of the plates spinning, and feeling pretty good about myself.  This is the kind of life that hamsters live.  Running on their wheel, oblivious to the fact that they are not getting anywhere, but still happily running.  They are convinced that all of this work is really paying off.  They are feeling pretty good about themselves.  Yet, there is no change, no progression, no growth.  I often wonder if this is what is meant by the phrase, ‘the PURSUIT of happiness.’ 

How dangerous this trap is.  The trap of mediocrity, comfort, and deception.  I believe this hamster life is described perfectly in its rodent relative term the ‘rat race.’  It is about people just existing day to day, just doing the daily grind.  We are contently pursuing our happiness, but never really finding it.  We become comfortable with this constant pursuit.  We have complaints, but our complaints become comfortable and familiar to us, so they make us feel safe.  We do not take risks, and because of this, we do not grow.  We convince ourselves that we are happy, that we are living well, but really we are wasting away and dying filled with regrets of not what we did but what we did NOT do. 

In short, the hamster life can eat away the soul at a voracious pace without one even realizing it.  It lulls you into a sleepy and comfortable unsatisfied state that renders you incapable of fulfilling your purpose or reaching your potential and makes you believe that this is life, that this is normal, that this is good.  It is a slow, painless death of our passion. 

When I say passion, I don’t mean passion in a physical way.  I am talking about what the soul wants, craves, and needs.  That is passion.  We all have passions, but how many of us have had them suppressed by fear or slowly killed by the deception of our hamster lives?

Hamsters run their whole lives, and then they are gone-- having accomplished nothing really significant.  I had become a hamster!  Cute, cuddly, admired and loved by many, but essentially useless and easily forgotten.  Have you ever been or are you now living the hamster life?  I think we are surrounded daily by fellow hamsters, sadly.   

Once I realized that I was perpetually running and going nowhere, I stopped running and took a moment to investigate.  The more I examined my life, the more I felt out of place.  I began to feel as if I were looking at someone else’s life.  I began to understand that my life was a carefully contrived scene that I thought would be really cool and really significant.  I think sometimes we create the life that we want to show others rather the life that we really want and need to live.  We get too caught up in judgments.  We create a picture of what success looks like based on our judgments, and then we configure our lives to look like that picture.  We are never really happy with it, so we continue to tweak it and change it in order to try to find happiness, however, staying firm in the main winning story line. 

Fortunately, this fake life typically shows flaws.  Heaven forbid you should be able to pull it all off without any hint of falsity.  For when we pay attention to the flaws, we catch glimpses of the truth.  I would later discover that there were clues about the real me in this fake life I was living.  Try as you may, the soul’s passions will not allow themselves to be buried completely.  Thank goodness! With some good sleuthing work, a bit of bravery, and a willingness to let go of your preconceived notions, you will find yourself chipping away at the faux life to uncover the treasure hidden inside. 

I thought this would be fairly simple, as I fancied myself a very nonjudgmental and open-minded person.  Boy was I wrong on that one!  I had built this life on judgments and on my fear of how I appeared to others.  

The more I learned, the more I felt like a foreigner in my own life.  I knew it was not me.  I was living a sham.  That is when the discomfort really came on strong.  Interestingly enough, once you realize that you are faking your life, you cannot comfortably continue the charade.